Lovers and Friends with Shan Boodram


There is so much great and life-changing information about sex and intimacy, but let’s face it, it can be dry as hell! Intimacy expert and sexologist Shan Boodram takes a deep dive into anything and everything about sex, relationships, and the science of attachment every week with expert guests and friends who will tell all. It’s everything The Talk should be.

Recent Episodes
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Recent Reviews
  • Pinkstar New York
    I love it here!
    I absolutely love this podcast. I’ve learned so much and am thankful to Shan for sharing so much insight on everything love and intimacy. Beyond grateful!
  • Donnabass68
    Lovers and Friends with Shan Boodram
    I’ve been a fan of Shannon and her work for a few years. Her insight and boldness is refreshing and her knowledge and passion is greatly inspiring. Her guests are awesome contributors as well. I wish her nothing but the best!
  • Tgeoerge317
    Amazing conversations!
    Hi Shan, I’m not entirely new to your Lovers and Friends because I’ve seen clips of some of your conversations, but I’ve subscribed and been steadily watching on YouTube for the past couple months. I’ve been on a journey to rediscover my body and enhance the way I think about and approach sex and relationships. Your show has been an integral part of my journey, and I love the different perspectives and experiences that are shared. You are so talented and great at what you do. Thank you so much!
  • Zerohearo
    What a show!
    Shan B. is so knowledgeable and does a fantastic job presenting a topic and how she wrestled with the available facts (and any feelings that come up too) to reach a conclusion. The interviews are incredible! Shan is inclusive and well rounded. She’s not afraid to dream and reflect.
  • Umi D. Love
    My Favorite Podcast
    I rarely leave reviews and I’ve never left a podcast review but this one more than deserves to be my first. I have learned so much and gained so much confidence in my sexual authenticity through listening to Shan’s perspective on love and sex. This podcast is informative, entertaining, and gave me a reason to look forward to my Wednesdays. Shan thank you for being such a light in the community that is love and sex education. The conversations were responsible, enlightening, and created so many healthy conversation starters in my personal life. I’m happy for you taking a break but look forward to the moments when you come back!
  • Ms_Holliday93
    Thanks for an amazing podcast! It really helped me grow and expand as a person.
  • JudyyyBJ
    Shan thee Great!!
    Love this podcast so dearly. You take your time explaining, you back things up with facts and not just feelings, you are authentic and the guess are well chosen. Even if you are planning to take a break just know you have put something of value into the atmosphere and we appreciate it🤍
  • Bets💕
    Ms Shan
    Shan I wanted to say I super enjoy listening to your podcast. So much so I sometimes save to listen while I take a Sunday drive 😆 . Wishing you and your family all the best on your next adventure. Besides gaining knowledge by listening, I really appreciate how you let your guests speak and get their thoughts/ opinions out after you ask them questions. 💕
  • l london ll
    Love this podcast
    I love this podcast and I’m sad to know you’re taking a break but I understand it’s needed. I’ve been listening since last summer and it helped me take my mind off my moms passing. It also helps me get through work ( I’m a massage therapist) so I guess I’ll have to listen to the old episodes over until you resume (hopefully)!
  • JadeAriane
    Huge fan of Shan & the show
    I’ve been following Shan off & on since her YouTube days and was over the moon when I learned she’d be coming out with a podcast. I’ve tuned in almost weekly since episode 1…absolutely incredible content. I love that Shan takes an objective perspective on the issues & topics she brings to the table & introduces us to people from all walks of life as they share their sex & relationship journeys with us. Sad to hear the show is going on a hiatus, but also inspired by Shan once again in her decision to pivot to family when her life called her to. Thank you and best wishes!!
  • nss002
    Listening experience is top tier
    This podcast is amazing. Full stop, period. I find that it keeps me engaged no matter what the topic is. I listen to podcasts occasionally while working my 9 to 5 and while commuting. I find that this is the only one I want to reach for because I know I’m always going to have an enjoyable listening experience (currently binging all the episodes). I want to strive to be come a better lover and friend and have similar conversations with my loved ones that they are having on the podcast. You can aways count on hearing interesting/ thought provoking guests and the afterwards reflection conversations are great too. Plus the production quality is top notch!! Thank you to the Shan and the team that puts this incredible work on. Just know you guys are making a difference. Much love, Navi
  • Hollyholhol
    Always better days with lovers and friends
    Listening to you has gotten me through some of my worst and best days.
  • Kingdonamix
    Courageous Candor
    I appreciate Shans vulnerability with not only the topics but the process of leading the business of a podcast with her family. All love and respect! The effort and grit is felt on this end! I try to do the same on The Kinship Collective Podcast! Learning from y’all!
  • Ihatcats
    Older Men Episode w/ Anna Akana
    This is one of my favorite episodes to date, not only because it relates so much to my early dating experience, but also because you and Anna were some of the first YouTubers I ever subscribed to ~10 years ago. It hit pretty hard when Anna talked about dating older men in her 20s — not because there was something wrong with her but because their attraction to her at that age is problematic. I hadn’t thought about it like that previously, and it takes some guilt away from that period of my life. Love ya Shan! -Desiree
  • Allegra412
    Difficult episode for me to listen to
    I enjoy this podcast even though I can’t relate to 99.9% of the topics. ☺️ this most recent episode about dating older men was difficult for me to listen to. I had to listen to it in shifts. In fact, I am still not finished. I never dated anyone except my ex-husband in my 20s and I was married at 25 and divorced by 34. Now in my 40’s and single, I feel like I wasted my youth and its too late for me. Being honest, listening to this episode, and hearing the experiences of the guest, made me feel even more regretful, but it was good to hear the point of view. I just wanted to leave a review because I really use this podcast as an educational tool, although it is very entertaining it has caused me to do so much research and opened my eyes to so many topics on good sexual and mental health. I highly recommend it.
  • Sarassaaaasa
    Love Dr. Brighten, so happy you had her on the show!!
  • Lizy_gf
    I learn so much each time!
    This show is one of my favorite podcasts! I learn so much each time I tune in. When I first began listening my husband and I was early on in our stages of Polyamory. We’ve listened together and used it as content to spark conversations. I’ve been hooked since! The last episode I listened to gave me so much insight about hormones and gave me hope that there are alternative options to relieve my hormone challenges I’ve been experiencing. Thanks to that episode I’ll be seeing an endocrinologist for the first time!
  • monique88!
    You are a gift from God
    I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS PODCAST. I’m not sure if you can talk about this but I’ve been in a relationship for three years now and I feel things are going downhill as the years go by. We have two beautiful kids together but prior to this relationship I had two children in a prior relationship. I have made it my main focus to build a bond in this family but it just seems our priorities are different when it comes to finances and parenting decisions, which before we had our two kids he understood where I came from handling life as a single mother before him coming into our life. Given he was a first time parent I did my best to help guild him and coach him on things but he always took it as me making him feel stupid. Fast forward to now he’s had his family involved in our personal business which give them a bad taste for me now I kept quiet with my village until now and now that my village has my back like his family has his I’m wrong he took all his stuff and left to his moms house but this is not the first or second time but at this point it’s the last. I feel like a failure but at the same time I need my peace back
  • Meli Reyes
    I’ve been following Shan for some year now and I am so so grateful she has a podcast now. Her openness , raw authentic episodes inspire me because not only is she an educator but she truly is open and wants to learn more about people, relationships , sex among much more. I don’t know how she’s done what she has but I think she is truly the best educator , talk show host, author (enter any title ) that you could follow. Follow her if you’re looking for a real authentic take on sex and relationships among much more.
  • lupita2022
    Amazing podcast - BEST HOST
    I’ve been a listener since the first episode and continue to tune in every week! I love the diversity of topics/stories and Shan does an incredible job asking questions and pulling out take aways. Even when the topics don’t apply to my life, I love listening to other perspectives and I always learn so much
  • haitian91
    Caribbean Culture
    Comparing the strip club to a fete is wild. Completely different and can’t compare the two. The environment and intentions are completely are different.
  • Whosvanessaa
    I love listening to all of shan’s work. Especially when I learn so much from it to the point where I find myself sharing her Podcast with family/friends. I now prioritize my relationship’s in a different and healthier way because of this. Funny enough, when I read her book I could hear her voice as I was reading ❤️
  • Nadia Centalva
    my favorite podcast, love the format
    love the format of this podcast! It's organized and it helps me understand a lot of perspectives into one idea. Keep up the good work. Thank you for sharing your journey with self-love. Your definition of fridge worthiness has given me clear language to explain family dynamics.
  • sabscription
    You Made Me Love Love Again
    Shan, you constantly keep me in awe! Your spectrum of topics discussed are always so exciting to hear each episode! You literally have me crying from how passionate you describe the love between you, Jared and your daughters. How you reflect that back into your self love is so inspiring. You just restored and reminded me of a piece of self love, and just love in general. I believe that I am worthy of love but I never really understood exactly why I keep choosing the wrong love. None of the loves I’ve chosen could love me through and through with every flaw and all. I couldn’t do that for myself. You’re inspiring me to do it now! Please keep this coming!
  • needsabath513
    Diverse perspectives
    Shan finally broke through to me and I’m giving the review. I really appreciate her as a host for the way she shares her experience with difficult feelings and experiences and is able to keep it real with herself and her guests. She’s a great conversationalist and it often feels like I’m just listening to a good chat with friends. And it’s refreshing as well to see successful people dealing with the same self doubt and relationship anxiety I feel. So thank you Shan (and Jared) for the work you put into this platform despite your busy, complicated lives.
  • Goldenlocks87
    Highlight of my week!
    Shan! This show is always the highlight of my week. I thoroughly enjoy learning and thinking about human sexuality and so many of your episodes are delving into important questions/conversations. My hubby and I sometimes listen together and often pause the episode to discuss our thoughts! One episode you mentioned that you wanted a Moscato-like wine recommendation and we both looked at each other open mouthed because we have a private wine service company, Sommptuous Selections (, where we are trying to bring the sexy back to wine! Anyways, we had a LOT to say about the bartender offering Hennessy as a substitute as obviously its not similar to Moscato at all. It appeared that the bartender exhibited some implicit bias towards you based on your perceived race (as both Moscato and Hennessy are associated with being stereotypically preferred by black people). We don’t know the whole story, but what we heard boiled our blood! Completely unacceptable for a multitude of reasons! Anyways, if you want a fun, approachable wine tasting to jump start your relationship with wine, hit us up!! If not, no worries! We truly love what you’re doing! Keep it up! PS your support of Jared’s music these past episodes are so beautiful! He is soooo talented!!
  • Thee Z. S.
    Love u Shan
    I’ve been a fan of Shannon’s for years and for some reason have just recently discovered her podcast some time this year and I’ve been doing a deep dive. She is so knowledgeable about relationships and sex, and I love how open she is about her own relationships and how she digs deep with her all her guests. Shoot I wanna be a guest!😩
  • jolondajoyce
    Best podcast hands down
    I love your shows, i legit have nothing bad to say. I leave with something each episode, I’m a sahm with little to no friends. I definitely join the conversations every week. Your guest are great and relatable. I would personally love an episode about being a new mom & wife and how to find ways back to sexy time, or even just finding time together to reconnect. While wearing all the hats we wear as moms and wives. I also love how long your episodes are. Just want to say thank you for giving your time and brain to these podcasts.
  • Mumamian
    Great podcast
    The conversations are insightful, open and engaging. Thank you Shan! Ps. I LOVE Jared’s theme song for this. I’m always dancing to the beginning and end.
  • Wanelo Fanatic !!
    This weeks episode
    I haven’t even listened yet. I just saw the title of this weeks episode and audibly gasped in excitement. I’ve been telling myself to leave a review for monthsss and I’m glad my first review is about this ep. Im a huge fan and get super excited to see what you have in store for us every week
  • Aubrey_bby
    Listen every week when driving to work
    Loving the show. I’d personally love to here about love and sex on this podcast from the transgender or autistic perspective on this podcast.
  • ScienceLoverGirl
    We're Actually All "Normal"
    Shan, I love this podcast! I really love how you structure each episode with an introduction, interview, and closing reflection. You even did an amazing job of introducing ads/sponsorships in a way that doesn't abruptly cut off your talking points. It's a very smooth transition. I have loved every episode, except for the one with Sincere, because like even you admitted I could not grab onto what he believed his reasoning for being on the show was and what he wanted to convey to us. I loved this week's episode with your parents! I have loved previous episodes where you have brought on male guests who discuss their sexual pleasures, desires, or lack thereof. This podcast is so eye opening and a reminder that we are all normal! None of us are the "only" ones to think a certain way. Your podcast gives voice to a lot of us who don't feel confident enough to speak up in this society and social media age where it seems like everyone thinks the same way, especially within the black community.
  • djsilk
    What Jada and Shan’s parents taught us
    This is amazing podcast in general. This episode is super enlightening and a must listen for everyone. I have 3 points to make regarding this episode. 1. Alicia Keys and J.Cole both wrote songs that referenced Will and Jada as being the kind of love we all should aspire to have and now we are all learning that during the period of time we were using them as inspiration and motivation to fight for a relationship that looked like their’s, it turns out that they were going through it in the worst ways. It makes sense why so many people are triggered by all of this. 2. Shan’s parents very candid interview in conjunction with what we are learning about Will and Jada’s relationship speaks to the most important ingredient to relationship longevity and that ingredient is commitment to the relationship. Having true commitment to a relationship means putting a priority on figuring out how to make the relationship function as best it can under the current circumstances and ignoring how things may have changed for the worse. People who are truly committed will make a way even when the way is not pleasant. 3. Interviewing your parents for the purpose of helping your audience to have a better chance to achieve healthier relationships is the kind of podcast and journalism work that is worthy of all kinds of awards and accolades so Shan please let us know where we can submit this episode for the awards that you want to be considered for. Shan scolded me for leaving a review and not providing my info so that she could reciprocate the love. For the record, I intentionally left out my info because I didn’t want to distract from my genuine admiration for her and the podcast. But I’m not getting scolded again so to check out the podcast version of me check out “The Cultured Misfits” podcast and for the DJ version of me “djsilk12” on and all of my links can be found in my bio on instagram @djsilk.
  • kayliekarma
    Favorite podcast
    To be honest, I look forward to new episodes every single week- it’s become somewhat of a ritual. You guys are doing great work , super inspired by you Shan! Thank you💜
  • Baduda
    Been listening for years!
    Great content! Great conversations! Valued insight!
  • Sheeva T
    I’m a Shan fan girl!
    Shan’s curiosity and passion for intimacy is helping me level up sooo much! I’ve been a day one! Listened to everything and even Enjoy the Podcast! Shoutout to the whole fam from Xya to Los! Everybody is part of this lovers and friends Framily!! I’m tryna get adopted!!!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️
  • ohbewiththeonions
    I never stayed for the honeymoon
    This episode really affirmed in me that not dating right now is the best thing for me. I tend to do the same where I try to show and give the person the best of me to ensure that they stay but ultimately they never do and realizing maybe it had nothing to do with me and all to do with them. Brenden has really done his own work! I’m also glad you touched on the “fast love” Bc 1 I really wanted that therapist at the end of the episode and 2 I agree women are taught to think that the man will say all the right things only to leave you hanging. Love you love your work please don’t stop
  • B Will Made It
    It’s Like Therapy for Free
    One of my favorite podcast. I love the constant evolution that we get to experience with Shan. It’s a perfect balance of fact, personal and opinionated information. I’m a person who lives and operates on facts and sometimes I need help understanding those difficult and unsaid emotions I am experiencing as an adult who is still finding herself and looking for that healthy balance in life. Love you Shan you inspire me in so many ways. Thank you, the work you do is valued and important.
  • MoriahHamiltoon
    Loved it
    This episode was an ear Gand and an experience, like every other time. I truly love the intimacy and depth of thought of Brendan and you Shan. Thank you for starting my Saturday.
  • Derric Ermias
    Hey Shan! Wow let me just say I have tried to write a rate and review for awhile but every time I think about you reading it in the podcast I get nervous because I hope it’s as insightful of a review as you are in the podcast. I have been a faithful listener and tune in weekly via audio. As a fellow podcaster myself I admire your techniques for interviewing and structure in how you put together the show and the way you can mix things up effortlessly despite the chaos around you. This week’s episode was particularly interesting for me because it allowed me to unpack some things about myself that I hadn’t given too much thought to before in respect to “chasing the fireworks”. This podcast is in my weekly rotation of podcast listens and I don’t plan on changing that any time soon! Also my podcast is called Grown Up with Derric Holland if you don’t mind giving it a listen and providing feedback from a fellow independent podcaster I would truly be grateful. Thank you for being an amazing example for independent and immigrant podcasters and creators!
    Epiphany…. Every single time.
    This show is everything. It talks about anything from internal to external situations and feelings. Always leave with an ah-ha moment and I love it!
  • Queen B1870
    In awe
    Shan, I have to say that I continue to be impressed by your delivery every week. You have a gift for asking thought-provoking questions of each topic and of your guests in a tactful manner. I really enjoy the multiple segments each episode is divided into, because I enjoy having multiple perspectives on every topic. You are poised, you are gracious, you are impartial. I am in awe of you.
  • afrisun
    Shan gets it right!!!
    This podcast has been so very affirming and helpful to me in my life. What makes Lovers and Friends different from other sex related podcasts is Shan’s talent to blend authenticity, curiosity, salaciousness, empathy, and accountability with scientific and data driven information. This is not just a “let’s talk nasty podcast”, although there is plenty of juicy sex talk. Also Shan’s ability to question herself, her knowledge and be open to other thoughts and opinions makes this such a refreshing listen. Plenty to enjoy, contemplate and get energized about with Lovers and friends.
  • CJAD1
    My life is changed
    I know Shan often asks everyone to rate and review. I always say I will, but am usually driving and life be life-ing. But I just listened to how we stop looking for love in lost people and I think she just changed my life.
  • viicp
    Love you!!
    I look forward to this podcast - specifically the YouTube every episode. I wouldn’t change a thing about it. Thank you for giving us the opportunities to learn through others experiences. We value what you do & appreciate your openness 💕✨this is a huge learning tool
  • duomom
    The information is amazingly useful as well as helpful. The delivery is straight no chaser. Love love your format and your delivery is mature and smooth going down. You present a different perspective a refreshing way of looking at things. Just amazed
  • oddest_
    This week’s episode
    This week’s episode made me BAWL. I relate so much to this week’s guest and her experiences with life and I’ve also found a partner who love me in the way I’ve always needed. I wasn’t expecting to have such a reaction to this episode. I always enjoy listening every week and hearing all the guest perspectives and your professional insights. I also love have seamlessly you throw in yours ads. I know that you need them for sponsorship, but you make them painless. Love this podcast!
  • no-names-availible33785036
    Great Pod and Fun listen!!
    Just found this podcast and really enjoying it!
  • The Wright Williams
    This podcast brings spice to my vanilla sex life! Thank you for sharing your journey and answering questions that I didn’t know I had a question about!
  • Ash Augus
    Love to listen!!!
    I absolutely love to listen to your podcast. Your content is so insightful and thought provoking. I enjoy your guests, just always seems like you are having a great time.
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